Over the edge?

I was bombarded by another bundle of phone calls all after noon. Finally around 730 as I was eating my plain bagel with veggie cream cheese and driving to the mall to look at shoes, which by the way I found none, except a pair of yellow heels I might have to go back for seeing as how I fell in love, I decided to answer my phone. Really, I had nothing to say, but the shear insanity of the never ending ringing was enough to drive me over the edge. How quickly I came to regret that decision though, just as I predicted I would. 

Through the 10 minute conversation, I became keenly aware that Mr. H still cannot fathom for the life of him why in the world I am so upset, apparently, he did nothing wrong. I called bullshit on that one, and really, there is no convincing me otherwise, not after everything I've done for him. He went on to tell me that he is convinced I am having "relations" with somebody else. I couldn't even dignify that with a response, other then to laugh, but if he happens to think so little of me, then so be it, I'm not really in much of a mindset to tell him differently. He can think whatever he wants as long as it helps him fall asleep at night, but the fact that he refuses to take responsibility for any of his actions is still a deal breaker. It's time to be a big boy, stop playing games and grow up. Just a little. 

And, while I am not having "relations" with anyone else, I am hanging out with Mr. B tomorrow after work, which I'm kind of excited about. I should feel blessed that even was able to space some of his beloved "free time" for me. (end sarcasm) I have to work a half day so we're going to get together afterwards until he has to work at 4. I considered my relationship with H over by now, so if you're wondering how I can justify this, well that's how. I'm not going to stay in something so unhealthy. I gave it my best shot and now it's time to move on. But really, why must everything be so complicated?

I watched Atonement tonight since I rented it this afternoon (I'm watching P.S. I Love You tomorrow afternoon!), talk about a heart breaking movie! I can't say that it's become my favorite, but it was a good one, and it was also pretty deep. It makes you really think about happily ever after, whether it's real or maybe just scripted, filled in for the critics. Well, it makes me think at least and it also seems to fit in just fine with the topic of the night. There were a lot of other things I thought about posting, but I'll save those for another night, I'm tired!